V is for Verb-ing. Or: I got a bad case of the Verbs.

I'm up late. Have an odd sore throat, should be in bed but I'm doing something I haven't done in weeks & weeks... catching up on friends/family via blogs. Honestly, I don't get the entire computer thing but I did love watching my niece KtG's 2 beautiful daughters be adorable with lollipops (she calls the candy "a sucker"--which is what S, at age 2.5 (14 years ago!) wanted to name her little brother, which is how he got the nickname, Lollipop, just sounded like a more polite name). And I enjoyed seeing my pals Noelle & Molly in the fine Utah Valley Magazine. Zina's very authentic chicken stock is, ummm, inspiring.

Learning Facebook, houseworking, reading, grooming, shopping, cooking, loving, spinning, yard work/rototilling/planning, speech therapy going, homeschooling, churching, skiing, visiting, quilting, attending parent/teacher confrontations, I mean conferences... Right now I feel that I'm doing a lot and none of it very well. Did I mention praying?

Actually, my mind often drifts to a cousin, the mother of a baby who later this month will have surgery for bilateral cochlear implants. He is actually a very blessed child. (N & M would really benefit from bi-lateral CIs but I can't sacrifice my family on the alter of insurance appeals and we really don't have approx $+50,000 EACH right now.) My thoughts are on his mother though. For all the blogs, Facebooks etc. I wish I could just call and talk to her. How is she doing? This is a brilliant, connected mother, with a super-fantastic husband. I don't want to intrude or leave any more messages. Their family is huge and supportive so I wonder if I need to talk to her for my sake. There are so many questions that I'd like answered. Perhaps I could answer some of hers...

M, whose language is faltering, told me today that my sketchbook is all fulled-up. I'm going to filled it up a bit more and am looking forward to starting a new one.

Mexican Beef Tips. Slow down & eat.

My printer (in my usual techNo-Nological stupor) is offline, perhaps permanently. Not knowing where else to keep this recipe, I am putting it here.

It is a good one to keep, practical and easy. It was in the Deseret News' ridiculous food section in November. Look! It doesn't call for breakfast cereal, Pillsbury products OR re-formed frozen cheesecake! (No joke, Valerie Phillips often calls for those ingredients.) Credit needs to be given to Alicia Ross and Beverly MILLS (real name?) of the Desperation Dinners syndicated column.

MEXICAN BEEF TIPS

FLEXIBLE: Serve shredded over/in/with lettuce, cheese, rice or chips for nacho, burritto or quessidilla filling/topping.

Makes about 10 cups beef and liquid.

Note: The beef will hold on low in the slow cooker for up to two hours before serving. Or prepare beef completely up to 48 hours ahead and refrigerate. Then rewarm on the stove top over medium-low heat for 15 minutes or until heated through, or place in the slow cooker on low for 45 minutes to an hour or until heated through. You may cool the beef completely and freeze it (with cooking liquid) in an airtight container for two to three months. Thaw in the refrigerator overnight, and reheat according to the directions above.

• 41/2 lb. extra-lean beef tips for stew

• 1 tbsp. chili powder

• 1 tsp. ground cumin

• 1 tsp. onion powder

• 1 tsp. garlic powder

• 2 (14.5 oz. each) cans Mexican-style stewed tomatoes (or regular stewed tomatoes plus 1/2 tsp. additional cumin and garlic powder)

Directions: Place the beef tips in the bottom of a 5-quart or larger slow cooker. Sprinkle chili powder, cumin, onion powder and garlic powder over the beef. Add both cans of tomatoes, with their juices, pouring them directly over the tips. Cover the slow cooker. Cook on low for 8 to 10 hours.

Stir well, and serve immediately, or store according to the directions in the Note above.

Variation: Stove-top method

Heat 1 tablespoon vegetable oil in a 41/2-quart or larger Dutch oven or soup pot. Brown the beef tips for about 5 to 7 minutes. Stir in the spices and both cans of tomatoes, and cover the pot. Bring to a boil, reduce heat to low, and simmer the beef for 31/2 hours or until the beef cubes are so tender that they fall apart. Stir and check the liquid level periodically, and add water to keep moist but not soupy.

Nutrition information per 1/4-cup serving: Calories 76 Fat 3 g Sodium 86 mg, Carbohydrates 2 g Saturated fat 1 g Protein 10 g, Cholesterol 31 mg, Dietary fiber 0 g

V is for Vanity.

I abuse my hands and nails in many different ways, dishes, laundry, food, spin classes, dog baths, clay, gardening, laundry, cleaning out the car {have you watched Mom My Ride yet?}, painting, sewing, scrubbing houses, children, mouths out and more laundry. A short while ago I had glitter (surprise surprise) "gel toes" after a pedicure. I asked if the same thing could be done on my fingernails. She suggested acrylic nails, but I squirmed. I'm not into the long white tipped nail look. She explained that it didn't have to look like that and I set an appointment. Voila. I LOVE MY NAILS. That is vanity. My hands have never (!) looked so good.

Valentine Special: Rejection Lines... perfect for all your confectionery put downs.

Before embarking on the confrontation cookies (see previous post) we came up with a list of rude, but not mean, things 12 year old boys and older girls could say to someone they would like to know less. Once I reached my 20's I realized there were many scenes that I didn't have the script for. Just trying to help my kids learn the script. :)
Here are some examples that I am trying to teach SKJN&M:
Someone asks you to babysit, go on a date etc.? I'd love to but I can't.
Someone asks you a very personal, and inappropriate question? Why do you ask?
What is your phone number? 8o1-WAY-WRNG. [just give a wrong number, practice before you need it.]
::X::X::X::X::X::
The phrases needed to be short and slightly funny. Here is the list we came up with:
Scram
Plop
As if
Don't even
ha ha ha ha ha
1800 GET LOST
Get Lost
Thanks for Asking
Next Time
Not U Again
Just Try.
Ha Ha NO.
Go Away
UR A ...
Poop
Nasty
Forget It
& Who Are You?
What's that Smell?
Maybe next time?
No Thanks
No
Now Go Away
Hardly
Love to, Not
Right
Gross
Sick
In Your Dreams
My favorite: What's That?

Nice ones:
Cutie Pie
Ask Me
I hope.
Cool Cat
(heart) of Gold
Smiley Face
Cupcake.
Hey Z! Have any contributions?

G is for goofy Gift ideas from our pal Valerie!!!

First, a brief intro: The following read by a funny 12 year old may be dangerous to your health. K read this to me last night at the Target parking lot and I was laughing so hard it was scary.

"It does NOT say 'you IS!'" "Does TOO! Look!" As he read the Valerie's article in a dry disbelieving way, laughing and practicing his delivery, I was busting up. Good thing we were parked. We went to Target to find some cool gifts for his favorite teachers and friends... wound up with mini tubs of Play-doh. Thought they could use some holiday dough! (His to/from cards do not(NOT) say that.)

Really, I can't write to the DMN paper. I look forward to Wednesdays too much. Actually, at first I was disappointed because the lead article, not her column, was about old Mountain Fuel and Utah Power recipe books. I agreed with Valerie! Those books were pretty cool. Most of the recipes that she chose to print were kinda odd though, for example the Corned Beef Cheese Ball that calls for canned corned beef.

Delight your neighbors with fun, clever gifts

By Valerie Phillips
Deseret Morning News

Published: Wednesday, Dec. 19, 2007 12:14 a.m. MST

"Neighbor gifts" are already showing up on doorsteps and desks. Many ideas have been passed around numerous times, often with an added twist.

For instance, the two-liter bottle of soda pop lends itself to lots of tag lines: "May your holidays bubble over with fun!" or "Pop, pop, fizz, fizz, oh what a great neighbor you is." Or "May your Christmas be merry and Sprite" or "We're soda-lighted to have you as our neighbor."

Last year I received another variation: "Seven Up-Lifting Thoughts," with seven thoughts listed that were, indeed, uplifting.

seven thoughts listed that were, indeed, uplifting.

If you're not into soft drinks, here are other simple ideas:

• Windshield scraper: "Amid snow or sleet or hail or slush, Merry Christmas from all of us!"

• Almond Joy candies: "Here's wishing you joy at Christmas."

• Long-handled grill matches or gas lighter: "To a matchless friend, may your Christmas be bright."

• Cake mix and wooden spoon: "Not a creature was stirring. ..."

• Muffin mix: "You're getting muffin for Christmas!"

• Ice cream scoop: "Have a cool yule!"

• A box of Ho-Ho cupcakes: "Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas."

• A can of nuts: "I just go nuts at Christmas."

• Small jars of spices or spice blends: "Seasonings Greetings."

• A scented candle: "Scenting you holiday greetings!" or "May your Christmas be bright!"

• Holiday washcloth: "We wash you a Merry Christmas!"

• Bubble gum: "We chews to wish you a Merry Christmas!" or "May your holidays bubble over with fun!"

• Frozen cookie dough: "Here's a little extra dough for Christmas" or "We've done the mixing, so you can cut up in the kitchen."

• Flavored butter or a jar of jam: "Spreading cheer this time of year."

• Dried or frozen pasta: "Have a pasta-tively happy holiday!"

• A hunk of cheese and grater: "To a grate neighbor from your cheesy friends next door."

• A basket with herbal tea, cocoa mixes or bath items: "For when you feel like a basket case."

• Hershey's Kisses in a wire whisk: "We whisk you a Merry Kiss-mas."

• Oven mitt filled with candies: "We ad-mitt you're a great neighbor!" or "Thanks for your helping hand" or "Merry Christmas from our pad to yours."

• Chex Party Mix: "Santa always Chex his list."

• Juice pitcher filled with candy canes: "We pitcher you raising a little cane during the holidays."

• A loaf of bread: "We're not loafing around! Merry Christmas!"

• Ready-to-bake pizza: "To someone with pizzazz."

• Oranges (or a chocolate orange): "Orange you glad we're friends?"

• Homemade divinity: "May your holiday be divine."

• Tins of flavored popcorn: "Just poppin' in to say Merry Christmas" or "Merry Christmas from your corny neighbors!"

V is for Valerie Phillips.

"Classy confections — Artisans know beans about chocolate" Ah ah ah. Oooh, that Valerie Phillips has done it again! She just has a word with ways, no wait that's Bush... she just knows how to stir up a tasty and tempting title.
The article is about 2 chocolatiers in Utah, some of the best in the country. They are so great they win national awards. I first read about them in a different section of the paper, naturally. I would love to go on a chocolate hunt and find out for myself why they are so divine, especially since my former favorite Scharffen Berger (now a Hershey company) is just not right any more. However, for the last while chocolate gives me a serious head & stomach ache. Boo hoo hoo. I would have loved the article even more! had it not been so tepid, short and full of cliches.
A friend recently asked what Valerie Phillips looks like. She is the food editor for a large-ish daily paper ... I think it is fair that I publish hers, if not a bit mean spirited.

A question here might be, "What would Rona do?" She wouldn't flinch: publish it. David Letterman's criteria for making fun of someone is that if it is something the person has done to him/herself it is fair game. If the situation is involuntary, don't use it. Clinton's "zipper problem" = fair game. The stupid things Paris Hilton's says? Fair. Hmmmm. Now that I am thinking about it... he might not publish VP's mug shot. She can't help that she likes green bean casserole, with fried canned onions on top ... but then again, she could have cooked up a garnished portrait with more flair, style and icing.

The other articles are about old-fashioned puddings (about 800 calories a bite) and chicken pot pies on the fast with frozen puff pastry tops. How elegant, upscale and quick!

I read all this and wonder, "Who chooses this stuff?" Oh yeah. Madame Phillips, Food Editor.

V is for B-Movie Victim

Life doesn't get better than this: On Wednesday I was in North Beach in San Francisco (where else?)...trotted past a candy store and saw some really funny little people in the window. When I went in I found they were for sale! Bought them. Then brought them home to delightful squeals from feigning horrified youngsters. Another great SF souvenir from a great and eye opening trip to visit two great auditory/oral schools for deaf children. (I'll write a lot more about that, but not now.)

Have to post this now! Mustn't wait! Gasp! A two headed beast accompanied by a diminutive Godzilla is attacking Liechtyville in our entry way. Horrified citizens are running for their lives!

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