G is for Gnome, ah ah ah.

Since I replaced the little gold balls, with pink and white paper hearts on thin Midori ribbon, on the Christmas tree in the spin room at Gold's Gym, last FEBRUARY, I have been expected to spruce up the place.

Playing with glitter, glue and lights is not hard for me... The gnome entered the scene when Rona, the instructor, "like no other," as S would say, told me (she doesn't ask) to bring in something for Spring. Naturally I brought a lovely fake fake fake flower arrangement, a bright pink watering can and the gnome, with some glitter. Then I added more glitter since he was hard to see in the dark room. Rona went nuts! She really loved it. The echo of her tattoo (a crown); the "Team Rona" shirt, some of her devotees had actual shirts made--the glittered garden gnome, just for Rona, seemed to please her.

Now, after a year of classes, legs of iron and zero weight loss, I realize that all of that is normal. What is not is that someone would bring goofy things into the spin room to decorate. So uncool it's cool? That's a stretch. I try to fly under the radar of the uber-cool advanced riders on Tuesday mornings...spooky gnomes are probably not their idea of cool anywhere, anytime or anyhow, to boot.

At the end of Summer I grew tired of the flowers and took it all away. After I asked, S gave me an American Girl doll-size chalk board to use for the start of school. Then I took all that away for a long while.

Several people were asking about the gnome, including Rona ... so while sweating to Rona's stories of celebrity chasing, gossip and the latest hip-hop-ish/dance music, the evil alter-ego occurred to me. Something like: Dr. Gnome and Mr. Mugwumps...

Since I took the picture the silhouette has been "disappeared." The cape and lights are menacing enough and most importantly distracting from the pain.